Nursing in public... and Applebees.

This is from a list I am on, I wanted to pass it on. I think I would be really upset if this had happened to me.

On June 14th (my anniversary) a few of my children (I have 8) took
me to Applebee's for lunch. For my own privacy I asked for the
corner booth. I sat facing into the corner not facing the room. My
then 7 month old baby boy needed to nurse so we did. A server
(Jessica Balswick) came to me and stated that the manager asked her
to come speak to me because she was a female. She said the manager
said if we wanted to breastfeed we had to cover the baby's head with
a blanket. I told her since it was hot out that I didn't have a
blanket. She reiterated so I stopped nursing and asked to speak
with the manager. As we waited the baby cried so I passed him
across the table to my oldest son (almost 18 yrs old) so he could
help comfort his as I was a bit shook up. The baby was inconsolable
so I told my son to take him to the van and I would come to nurse
him as soon as I spoke with the manager. When the manager (Justin
Arnolds) came I handed him a copy of the KRS 211.755 law that I keep
in my diaper bag. I said "I would like you to educate yourself and
your employees of this law that protects breastfeeding mothers." He
handed it back to me after glancing over it and said "I know but
somebody complained it was indecent exposure so you have to cover
the baby with a blanket if you want to breastfeed here". I again
held out the paper saying "look at part 3 of the law, it says no
person shall interfere with a woman breastfeeding her child". He
said the same exact thing as before "I know but somebody complained
it was indecent exposure so you have to cover the baby with a
blanket if you need to breastfeed here." At that exact moment our
server came back with our meal and I said "We can not eat this
because I have to go breastfeed my baby." As I exited the hostess
asked what was wrong and I told her very briefly and said "I don't
see anyone else eating under a blanket in here."
I went to the van, nursed my baby, cried, and called my local LLL
leader Karen. She told me to get the manager and servers name. She
gave me names and addresses of people I needed to let know about
this incident.
Our lawyer wrote a letter on June 27, 2007 to Applebee's restaurant
(4009 Nicholasville Rd., Applebee's Corporate Headquarters 249 E
Main St. (Mike Scanlon) The Lexington-Fayette County Health Dept.
(Doraine Bailey), The KY Breastfeeding Promotion Coordinator (Becky
Derifield) and the LLL Karen Brown.
The letter was ignored.
Our lawyer wrote another letter on July 25, 2007.
On August 3, 2007 Thomas & King, Inc. Legal Department finally
responded. Mr Jonathan R. Weatherby, Jr. Associate General Counsel
wrote "we regret that Ms. Ryan left without being served and would
like the opportunity to personally invite her to return" .... "we
are also considering keeping blankets in the restaurants for use by
breast-feeding mothers that may not have them readily available as a
result of this incident."
My husband gasped when he read this response. They just don't get
it. It is like saying "Rosa Parks still has to sit at the back of
the bus but we will give her a pillow so she is comfortable back
there."
My midwife suggested I speak with the Senator that spearheaded
getting the KRS211.755 law. I left a message for Senator Tom Buford
and the next day he called me back. I asked him what recourse I
had. He said "If you take them to small claims court you could get
up to $1,500.00" .... "if you take them to a higher court you may
not even get enough to cover your legal fees." I told the Senator
I was not interested in money. I want things to change. I want
public attention on this cause. I have daughters that will someday
breastfeed. I want action not money. I told Senator Buford about
my nurse in/out idea and he thought it sounded great. In fact he
said "let me know the date and I will come by and support you" ....
he also said "hold a sign up saying -small children are not allowed
to eat in this restaurant." I said "can I quote you on that" and he
said "yes!" Senator Buford said "next time any one does this tell
them to call the police and get a police report written up on it."
Since August is "World Breastfeeding Awareness Month" I am having
one nurse-out at the Fayette Mall just to raise awareness. This is
not in any way to attack the mall .... it is just a place to hang
out at. I am late arranging this so it will not actually be in
August but then again what is one day. It will be September 1st.
The second event is actually to draw attention to Applebee's
restaurant. Friends and supporters will decorate posters and
display them for all to see.
I will paste a copy of the flyer for each of the two events here for
all to copy and share.

NURSE-IN
Fayette Mall Lexington KY
Childrens Play Area
Saturday, September 1, 2007
1 pm until 3 pm
Celebrate World Breastfeeding Awareness Month
Please join us for a local "awareness raising" event.
Look for this universal Breastfeeding symbol.

NURSE-OUT
SPEAK-OUT
Applebee's violated KRS 211.755
Educate Lexington that KY law protects public
breastfeeding and mothers should never be
asked to move, hide, cover up, or leave.
Decorate posters and display them
at a peaceful Nurse-Out.
THEME: Breastfeeding in public is Legal
DATE: Saturday, September 8, 2007
TIME: 12 pm to 2 pm
(in case of rain date 9/22/07)
LOCATION: 4009 Nicholasville Road
Lexington KY
On the public sidewalk
in front of Applebee's
Exercise caution and do not block the right of way.
News crews will be reporting.
Do not park in Applebee's parking lot!

I hope everyone can pass this on to as many as possible.
Every "quotation" is in the exact wording.
I am also willing to share copies of the actual correspondence
between our lawyer and Applebee's.
Even if you do not live in KY please share this with everyone
because Applebee's is nation wide.
Thank you for your support,
Brooke Ryan

Just wanted to pass this on. I think we need to be able to feed our children when they need to eat.

Laptops/Kids/Water... fun times.

My foster daughter put water on my laptop. I turned it off immediately, and let it dry out for a week. After what I did with my old cell phone, it was the smart thing to do. I washed that cell phone and when I turned it on to see if it still worked, without drying it out, it fried itself before my eyes.

Now I know.

But the keyboard is still effed up. In a bad way. You can barely understand what I type. So now I have to compete with the 5 yo for the desktop computer and figure out how to get the laptop fixed. Said 5 yo says to me today... "can't you use YOUR computer?" News flash kid: Both of them are mine. Mine, mine... all mine.

I was happy to share until I was doing some kid related task and no one could protect my computer. *L* Now, there is no sharing.

Sigh...

OK, so I really don't think I am paranoid. I applied for foodstamps and help with daycare while I go to school. We make little enough currently until, I can find some new daycare kids that fit in with our family. I called my mom and asked her if she might want to watch the kids one day a week for 10 weeks. She said that she didn't want to. I was going to pay her to spend time with her grand kids. She said no. She makes out like she has all this stuff to do. Let me tell ya. She doesn't. It is her and my dad. Even if my dad gives her stuff to do during the day, it CAN'T be more than what I have to do here. More than she had to take care of when we were little and she had 5 kids to take care of? She won't even stop by to visit with the kids for 20 minutes every now and again. My parents have never watched my kids over night (minus Emerald) and won't even watch them very occasionally. We are talking in 5 years. She did watch them once a week for 2 hours for 4 weeks last Oct/Nov. But generally just won't have anything to do with them... or me.

We went to Keri's inlaw's for a get together, and she didn't even hold Eliza. Everyone held her, except my mom. She wants nothing to do with me. I sat by her, she didn't even say one word to me.

I pay for her cell phone bill, I call to make sure they are alive. I do call to ask about how to cook things... and chit chat, but she says that I only call because I want something from her. She is right, I do. I want her to be a mom, and a grandma. I never expect people to watch my kids all the time. My ex inlaws would get upset because I didn't let them see Emerald all the time. I had her because I wanted kids, and I take responsibility for them. It isn't like I want someone to watch them while I go out and party... it isn't even for a break. It is so I can go to school. So I can do something with myself.

Honestly, I think that as soon as I have a chance I am going to move as far away from them as I can. My friend Amy even noticed that my family doesn't talk to me WHEN THEY ARE AT MY HOUSE!

Oh and happy birthday to Amy. After talking to my mom on the phone last night, I was so upset that I went to bed and forgot to call. :( I suck. I am sorry.

OK, so after thinking about it, I can see that it isn't just me. My parents never watched my brother Gerry's kids either. Not just mine. Not mine, not his. But both Kelly and Jim's kids, and they each have one, and are the "favored" kid.

Keri is lucky that her dh is a decent guy with a good family. Her kids won't miss out on having grandparents when ours flake out and ignore hers too.

I feel like I want to throw up.

My husband thinks I am heartless. I am not. We had 2 cats, Wyatt and Cecelia. We got them, with the deal that Emerald would take care of them, with Shawn to back her up. That hasn't happened. Well, obviously Emerald can't take care of them, she isn't here to do that... but Shawn was barely doing his job with them. They started peeing all over my basement. The whole place reeked of cat pee. I couldn't stand it, and I felt like my other stuff, Emerald's stuff, her old clothes and toys would get ruined because of the cats. I just couldn't live that way. I tried threats to get him to understand that they needed to be taken care of daily, or twice a day. He just couldn't do it. In his defense, he works a lot, he will be going to school soon, there just wasn't time in our day for the cats, kids, work, school, dog... etc.

So the lady, Marie, picked them up today. Anya cried. Shawn said she was hysterical when they got picked up, and she has been making cards to them ever since.

Marie seemed really nice. She wanted both the cats, and that was a priority for me. They are beautiful. With them gone, part of Emerald left too. I hurts me. I am sad. But it will be easier here for us. A tiny bit more time for each other. Less to argue about. That is worth something too. After all, we are still here.

I had an interview scheduled.

But she just called to cancel. I am disappointed, but can't help but think that maybe there will just be something better around the corner... If I could find another kid for during the day, that would be best, and give me and my kids some sense of normalcy.

Well, so I really did it.

That daycare mom had paid me after she realised I wouldn't back down. So I let her stay on. Things were going pretty well. Until she called me yesterday and said that they wouldn't be back until after labor day because she can't afford my rates. But after labor day she still won't be able to afford my rates because she wants to pay even less than what it would cost for the two of them. So if I let her stay and come back after labor day I am just looking at more of this same bullshit.

No way. I told her that she wasn't coming back after labor day. That's it. I am done.

I think she thinks I am going to back down, but I am not. I told her that I love children, but not so much that I wanted to watch hers for free. She said then that she thought maybe I shouldn't do childcare. WTF? How does that make any sense. She is a nurse, so by her criteria, shouldn't she want to be with patients constantly?? Egotistical bitch this woman is.

It is a shame really, I love her kids.

I swear she believes that because she adopted them, she deserves special treatment in life. She doesn't. She is supposed to be the one giving out the special treatment to the kids, she isn't supposed to be the one getting it...

And I realised something else. Every time I have opened my house to weekend parents I have gotten nothing but grief. One mom complained when I took 2 days off for the entire MONTH. When Emerald got sick, she brought her children anyhow, with no regard for my kid being in the hospital, and me going through dealing with it. The last mom I had here, owes me 3 K in childcare payments. I had to send her to collections. Never should have gotten that out of control, but I felt sorry for her when the state kept turning her down. Now this broad. Why she feels it necessary to take food out of my kid's mouths while hers goes and does all sorts of fun "camps" all summer I will never know. Paying me less than $2/hour is unacceptable. I pay teenagers more than that to watch my kids.

I decided that I am going to make a go at photography. I still have my 2 daycare kids, I will take a couple more if they are week kids. For now, I can do on location shoots, and limited studio stuff, as I only have so many back drops and props.

Going to write a business plan to get it all going.

Just thought this was funny...

I have no idea why... LOL